I wrote a blog this morning and sent it to Courtenay for editing. Here is her response when I called her to ask how the editing process was going:
â€œThat is the worst blog youâ€™ve ever written, and Iâ€™m not even done figuring out what youâ€™re trying to say in the second paragraph, which comes after a run-on partial sentence/paragraph in the introduction. Plus, sometimes your parenthetical asides are more distracting than helpful.â€
â€œOkay, Iâ€™ll rewrite it.â€
â€œNo, Iâ€™ll just rewrite the whole thing, if I can even figure out what youâ€™re trying to say.â€
â€œItâ€™s okay, Iâ€™m a better writer; Iâ€™ll do it myselfâ€
â€œYeah, youâ€™re a much better writerâ€¦ â€˜Blah blah incomplete sentence blah, I feel better, I thought everyone hated me, but they donâ€™t, and by-the-way I want a new bike.â€™â€
Below is the long version of that synopsis (rewritten by Courtenay Brown):
A day ago I was in way too much pain to think about leaving this place. Then, even after my fever broke and my headache went from â€œpiercingâ€ to plain old â€œdullâ€, I still didnâ€™t feel bored or antsy to get out of my hospital bed or tiny hospital room. Thanks to Google, with Gmail’s video chat and Google Voice, I was able to pass the time talking with far-away friends and family COURTENAY despite a dead cell phone battery.
Here in Colorado Springs, however, I wasnâ€™t so sure that anyone noticed I was sick. I figured Kevin was in Florida, Matt was getting ready to go to Florida, it was Jill’s birthday yesterday and she was getting ready to go to Florida, and I should have been on my way to Florida too! Then Sherry (the “Resident Mom” at the OTC) called to say she was going to come visit â€“ she showed up with the birthday girl in tow! – and Matt even found a car to borrow so he could come poke his head in and tell me the cross hanging in my room is definitely not a â€œrealâ€ Catholic cross because there is no sign of suffering. Thank you Courtenay for making this paragraph have a beginning, middle, and end!
I also found out that, after a full day of debating and trying to figure out logistics (not their strong suit), my parents are flying to Colorado Springs today after Mom finishes rowing practice so they can make sure I am OK. Iâ€™m looking forward to seeing them, and to helping them feel useful. I am moving into a new room in the permanent-resident dorms this weekend, and with the condition Iâ€™m in, Iâ€™ll need a lot of help â˜º. This paragraph was written entirely by Courtenay.
After all of yesterdayâ€™s visits and good news, I slept better than I have in a week, and woke up this morning feeling only mildly ill. So now I’m trying to plot my race schedule. How do I use this delayed season start to my advantage? I’m obviously not going to be kicking everyone’s butt in Miami this weekend, and I’ll likely be ducking out of Mazatlan next Saturday as well. How do I get the points I need to race in the World Championship Series, make a little bit of money (to use for visiting, and possibly at some point being able to live close to, my studious, fast, and hot girlfriend at whichever awesome school she decides to spend the next ~5 years), please the excellent sponsors I currently have, and show potential bike sponsors that, because I kick ass on a bike, I should kick ass on their bike. That’s a long list of things to accomplish with a now-shortened season.