The Clif Hammer Wedding Weekend

It was a big weekend. Saturday Herriott Sports Performance hosted a talk by Brian Frank, the owner of Hammer Nutrition. I went in and met Brian briefly, but had to leave before the lecture because one of my oldest friends (as in I’ve known her longer than just about any of my friends) was getting married. Apparently Hammer is coming out with a couple new bar flavors this year, which is good because when I was living with a Hammer athlete I got really tired of Almond Raisin and Chocolate Chip. Don’t get me wrong, the bars are great, but when you’re eating a bar an hour on the bike, you can get sick of pretty much anything.

The wedding was awesome. Emily and Ben had already done the legal part of the marriage, so the ceremony was simple. They turned on some music, walked out in front of everyone, said some nice things to each other, then directed us to enjoy the party. The entire ceremony took about 2 minutes, which is short enough to maintain my attention.

As for the party, it was like a middle school reunion. Many of the people there I haven’t seen in ten years, and it was so long ago I can’t remember much about any of them. It’s a little strange to know everyone’s name at a party, but have no clue what they’ve done with their life. ( “Hey Maggie. Did I ever tell you how much fun I had at your Batmizfa?” ) Regardless (or maybe I should say, ‘as a result of which’), the party was a lot of fun. (Hooray!)

image Sunday was Lunafest, a film festival by for about women. I went with my friend Tom, a local cyclist, and we were likely the only men there. It was a great time, though the turnout was probably less than the Luna Chix and the Breast Cancer Fund had hoped for. The films ranged from cute to humorous to weird to meaningful, and ranged from a minute to twenty. My favorite was (of course) called Breaking Boundaries, about Sandra Van Ert, an amazing ski / snowboard racer who redefined age in her competition. The other greats of the show were Family Reunion, about a girl struggling with the decision to come out to her family in Iceland (she’s stressing out when, at his birthday party, her grandfather announces that his friend and roommate is also his loving partner), and a very strange film, the guarantee, about a man who was encouraged to get a nose job in order to further his ballet career. I was not the target audience for these films, but I managed to have a good time anyway.

Oh, and going back to variety, there were Luna Sunrise bars and Luna Tea Cakes outside the festival. The whole line of flavors that Clif and Luna offer are really good, but I definitely recommend trying the Orange Blossom Tea Cakes, which are made in partnership with Luna Bar and The Republic of Tea.

Published by Ben

Ben Collins Professional Triathlete

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  1. I almost forgot about that.

    Outside the Karaoke Bar we went to after the wedding there were three 12 or 13 year old boys hanging out talking to everyone that went into the Chinese Restaurant (to sing their hearts out). The boys told us they were hiding from the police because they had already been kicked out of that particular strip mall, and they were afraid of beign sent to Juvenile Detention.

    Kurt and I stayed for a few minutes to discuss with the kids exactly how lame this strip mall was, which induced an eruption of obscenities for all three boys. The shouting then lead to punching as the boys argued over who the leader was of their group. They settled down and told us how the three chinese restaraunts in this particular strip mall were the home to the chinese triads, who aparently wanted to kill the kids – just for being kids. We laughed, and they insisted it was true until our laughing forced them to change the subject. They told us about the motorcross show they had gone to earlier in the day, and how doing drugs and riding in a police car is a majestic experience (i’m paraphrasing here). I told them drugs are bad, and got in my car.

    “Hey, aren’t you drunk? You should try speeding while drunk, it’s fun!”
    I was about as sober as they come.
    “Oh man, what am I thinking?! Maybe one of you should drive!”
    I wish I had a picture of their faces as their eyes filled with excitement, which gave way to anger (as they turned to argue over who would drive), then fell to despair (as they realized I was joking). It was an entire tragedy, played out in under five seconds.

  2. #1 rule of blogging, take pictures – because you can save yourself, well a thousand words. I’m also not sure what to think about a Clif sponsored athlete going to a Hammer Nutrition sponsor (I hope you asked about the lawsuit and where they sourced their materials) following it by a Luna-Bar (CLif product) sponsored event. I’m very confused by your life right now. I liked your post about your cat throwing up more.

  3. Yeah, I forgot my camera, so I wasn’t able to snap any shots of the vegan buffet and wedding cupcakes. Or the crazy kids in North Seattle. The banned substance scandal is what I most wanted to hear about from Brian Frank, but since I didn’t actually get to see his presentation I didn’t get to hear. I love Clif bar products, and that’s all I use, but it’s always good to meet people that have devoted their careers to finding organic supplements to aid athletic performance.

  4. Ha ha ha…I was still cracking up about the crazy kids scene and then I read Loren’s response and cracked up more.

    Oh, kids these days. So crazy.

    Sounds like an awesome weekend.

  5. um are you sure you weren’t hanging around in down town ______(insert small marin town)?? Sounds exactly like the little punks I grew up with.

    I still can’t believe you went to the film festival, the women probably reacted like when a guy is in a Wellesley class. 20 girls 1 guy, always weird.

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